Plants, People, Patience.

My plants are still alive! I'm really excited because all of my plants look healthy and have been flowering over the past few weeks. The tomato I showed last post has gotten really fat and I can't wait for it to start turning red. I feel like any day now it's going to start ripening. Having a mini-garden has been really fun and also relaxing. I check my plants twice a day--I'm a little obsessive I guess, but I like to see the changes in the plants.

Flowering zucchini plant.

Look how much it's grown!

Other than that, I've been working and hanging out. Trying to read a bunch and write with Stephen here and there. We came up with an idea for a book--a kid's picture book. I think the idea is really good and I'd like to actually create a book on our own. One of my life goals is to get a kid's book published. We decided that Stephen would do most of the illustrations and I'd assist. I'm going to be the colorist (basically the person who colors in the pictures) and we'd co-write it.

Work has been really fun so far. I am the 4th grade teacher in program and my kids are so cute. They are definitely an active bunch and I'm learning how to manage them (I've got 25 of them!), this experience will be really good for me. Most of my responsibilities include behavior management which is always a challenge. As I was telling my boss yesterday, I've worked with middle and high schoolers and toddlers, but very little with upper elementary--so this is going to be a great opportunity to expand my skills. Overall, I'm so glad to finally have a job and to be working with kids. It helps me put my life into perspective and I feel like I am a part of something greater than myself.

Another good thing happened lately...I got my California teaching license! This is really exciting for me because now I can start working on my classes toward my ESL certificate and get ready to suit up for next year's job hunt! I feel as if everything is starting to come together.

In other news, I found out my brother is going to be deployed in June 2012. I am having mixed emotions about it--he seems ready to go, but I can't help but worry. I'm trying to strong for him and be supportive. My mom's not taking it very well, though. She's going to be a nervous wreck when he's over in Afghanistan and when we aren't able to communicate with him. Regardless, I'm extremely proud of my brother and I love him. I wish he were here in California so we could all hang out and go to the beach and just be stupid together. We are really close--there are things he knows about me and I know about him that we'd never even fathom of telling our parents. That's how we've always been.

***

I just don't understand why we are still in the middle east. I understand that we just can't abandon ship and pull out our troops all at once and leave the troops we are training against the Taliban, but again--why do WE need to be doing that? Why do WE need to be over there? Currently, there's a drought in Somalia that's killing thousands of people. Why isn't our military over there helping distribute aid to those dying people. I wish that our military was used for more humanitarian work instead of "defense". Yes, I do agree that we need protection, but how is being over in the middle east protecting our people? Our troops should be HERE protecting us. I feel as if our country feels the need to stick our nose in other nation's business too much and that we don't see what's really going on in the world or even our country. We need to take care of our country first instead of spending billions of dollars on improving the military in other countries because currently, our country isn't looking so hot.

Growing Greens

My green thumb has not really been very supreme over the years. Sure I've had house plants and kept them alive, but they always seemed to just die after a while under my care. I could never really figure out why my house plants would die. Mom and Dad have always grown everything: flowers, vegetables, fruit trees--their green thumb is super muscular and I started to worry that I didn't inherit the growing green gene. When Mom asked me if I wanted to get some vegetable plants and try to set up a mini-garden I was apprehensive, but wanted to give it a try since she would be supporting the growing process. We went and got a honeydew melon, zucchini, eggplant, artichoke and tomato plants.

Planting the plants was easy, but the tending and nurturing part was what I worried about. Not only is my green thumb underdeveloped, but we have three dogs (also known as the wolf pack). During the day the dogs have free roam while everyone is at work and they are notorious for eating flowers off plants, grass, and digging up whatever they please. My dad didn't think that my baby plants would make it past a few days with the dogs, but for some reason I felt that the dogs wouldn't bother the plants since Mom and I planted them in pots.

So far, the plants have been in the ground for the third week and they are doing well! I obsessively check them everyday for new flowers and leaves budding. All of them are going crazy! The garden loves the sun it gets. The tomato is the first to fruit--so far there's one little baby green tomato. I can't wait for the other plants to fruit. Garden grown vegetables are so delicious and it's rewarding to eat food you have grown. Every day that I water, the dogs assist me and I remind them that they are to NOT eat their sister's (my) plants. As long as they get attention and love when I water the mini-garden they seem to act as if my plants are not even there.

Peace and love :)

First fruit! It gets bigger every day!

Employment--Economy

I finally got a job! I'm really excited! Because this is the internet and you never know who's lurking around I am going to strategically not drop names. However, that will not prevent me from talking about how I feel and the type of work I am going to be doing.

Starting next week I'm going to go to work for a non-profit after-school program as a teacher. My placement is at an elementary school--I don't know what age I'll have, but I can't wait to see. Even though my teaching certification is 5th grade-Adult I still love the little ones. Part of me has considered whether or not I should have gotten an elementary ed. certification, but I love teaching English too much to give it up.

On Monday I have an interview with a local elementary school for a tutor/monitor position. This job is part time and would be perfect to coincide with my after-school job. It's in a public school district, so I'm hoping that if I do land this job it will be a good foot-in-the-door for teaching positions once I get my credential completed.

I'm happy to finally have a job, it was starting to wear on me. From the time I was 16 I've been working. I decided this past month that I couldn't be a stay-at-home mom for longer than like a month or two. Yeah, there's plenty of time to do really awesome things with your little ones, but once they go to school what do moms (0r dads) do all day besides clean and cook? Once you get done cleaning and cooking what do you do? Read? I'd read, but after that I get bored. As much as I love reading I can't lay around and do it all day. I read everyday for about an hour or two. As an Aries I have to be moving or doing something active. Whenever I see those ladies running while pushing those baby carts I always say, "that'll be me,"! I respect moms and dads who stay at home. My mom did it for so long, and I really appreciate and respect her for that. It was her decision and I'm glad she was there. My dad had to work a lot when I was a kid, so we needed a stay at home parent to run the show.

In the back of my mind I have all these ideas for my future. One of those pictures is me being able to raise my kids while having a great career. It would be so ideal to only work like 3 days a week, but in the education field that's nearly impossible and if you did find that the pay would be not worth a damn. Who knows, maybe by the time I have kids the U.S. will have a completely new economy and we will only have to work 3-4 days a week like the Europeans do. Who knows. I feel that our nation needs to completely revamp our system. We need to wipe our slate clean and quit importing/exporting. We need to keep our goods here, feed our people with the food we grow, give people jobs instead of outsourcing, bring our troops home and quit tearing down cities and rebuilding them in foreign lands that costs billions of dollars when there are starving babies all across our nation. I know this would take years and probably a social revolution, but hey--history repeats itself and it's been approximately 40 years since the 1960s. I'm looking to get some crazy social change going on and honestly go nuts.

Peace and love...that's what we should be all about.

The Power of the Ocean

In my International Literature course I was required to read Mimic Men by V.S. Naipaul. The main character talked about how his element was snow. He felt he related to it and it represented his personality and the way he thought about life. I feel as if water is my element. I love water--not only do I drink it all day, but I love swimming. I love the beach, or body of water that I can immerse myself in, and I love the power of the ocean. Even little koi ponds or fountains in people's yard catches my attention. I am fascinated with marine life--when I was in elementary school I wanted to be a marine biologist.

This past week my aunt and her two youngsters visited us. They came all the way from Tucson, AZ. I've never been there, but according to them it's a "desert ghetto". The image they put in my mind was a landscape of dry red dust everywhere with gigantic cacti and skeletons of dead animals strewn about. This is an exaggeration to the max, but my cousin--age 15--is the queen bee of hyperbole. I love her!

In order to fulfill their getaway we went to the beach twice. On Tuesday we went to Huntington Beach, also known as "Surf City USA". We brought the skim board and boogie boards with us. Once we claimed our plot of sand and greased ourselves up with sunscreen we all turned into water babies and were in the water most of the day. Even my Aunt tried to boogie board; she's not much of a water person!

I haven't been boogie boarding in a few years, and I used to shred when I was younger. In my own theory little kids are better at boogie boarding because they have less weight to displace in the waves, but that's besides the point. I was eager to impress everyone with my awesome skills so I ran out and started to wait for the perfect wave. There were two sets of breakers. The first set was too small for me at the time and I didn't want to come up on the sand after catching a wave, so I paddled out to the second set of breakers where if I caught a wave I'd come out in the first zone of breakers.

A wave started to crest and I thought, "okay, this one looks great!". I turned my board around and started to kick. The crest formed into a 6' wave and I started to ride down with it until it broke. My board started to nose dive in the water and I felt the wave crash down over me and my board. I felt my legs fly over my head and my board shoot up above the water while I was being drug along the sandy bottom. A series of curse words flew through my mind. I had been in that situation before and I reminded myself not to panic, just to wait until the wave spat me out.

I stood up and was finally out of the wave. I turned my board around to watch the waves so I wouldn't get thrashed again. I wanted to adjust my crumpled bathing suit now full of sand so I hopped off my board and tried to stand. My foot didn't touch the soft sandy bottom. I realized that I was much farther out than I had realized and looked at the beach to see where my family's station was set up--it was almost out of sight. I had been taken down the beach by the rip current and I could feel the waves pull me towards the ocean. Panic started to rise in my chest, but I told myself that if I panicked and tried to swim against the current I'd end up probably having to have the lifeguard come save me. I calmed myself down and started to ride the waves diagonally towards the beach. The less you fight the waves and the more you let them push you the easier it is and eventually you'll be on the beach. Finally I could touch the bottom and I started to walk towards shore. For the rest of the day I stayed in the first set of breakers.

The power of the ocean is immense. I feel that is why I am so fascinated with it. Marine biologists still do not understand, completely, how the ocean works. Many people are afraid of the ocean and I can see why. I don't feel afraid of the ocean; more so, an awe. I am in awe of it's raw power and intensity to give life and to take it away. In my lifetime I hope to see more of it, understand it more, and to live near it.

(Stephen and Zack in the first set of breakers)

(Huntington Beach: Surf City, USA. Taken from Pier)

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

Quick update: In order to teach one must usually take a bunch of tests in order to become licensed. In order to teach in California (and to apply to a bunch of educational jobs and get into Master's programs for teaching) one must take the CBEST--a basic skills test. Well, I took it the third damn day I was here and still exhausted from driving across the country and needless to say, I didn't score so hot on the math section (I'm terrible in math) and I didn't get the score I needed in the reading section. The third section, writing, wasn't scored immediately since an actual human being needed to read it and determine the score. In order to pass the entire CBEST I needed to get a 123 overall and my combined reading and math was only 77--I needed 46 on the writing to pass. Driving home from the test I was pissed, disappointed, and frustrated--I was blaring my music and cursing at the way people were driving. I was sure that I would have to take the test all over again similar to my ACT experience in high school. I took the ACT 4 bloody times...

Today, I saw that my unofficial test scores were in my email inbox. I took a deep breath and told myself it was okay if I didn't pass, I could just take it again. Like I've mentioned before, I'm trying not to get so upset over letdowns. I clicked the email and scrolled down looking at my scores...

Math: 37 (uggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg)

Reading: 40 (could of done better....)

Writing: 47 (F*&$ YEAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! Ran upstairs and jumped on the bed while Stephen was still asleep. "Baby I passed the CBEST by 1 point!!!!!!! ")

He was proud of me. I'm so happy that I don't have to take that test again. Testing has never been my strong point.

Have a great day, much love :)

Walking a Cat

Moby loves to go outside, and used to in WV. Well...we have coyotes here and I don't want to risk her becoming someone's dinner, so she's no longer allowed to go out. I felt bad, because she loves to go out and play. Once I started letting her go outside in WV her health really started to improve and she seemed like a completely different cat. A compromise was reached as I found that Pet Smart sells CAT LEASHES!!!!

Have a great day :)

Wow--summer is in full kick! It's about one million degrees here in California and I know everyone back in WV is hot as Hades, too! Fourth of July was pretty fun! I laid out and read most of the day; I'm actually getting some color, can you believe that? When it got less scorching outside Stephen and I went and played tennis. We've become quite the tennis fanatics. It's really fun and I highly recommend it. While we were playing, a thunder storm started forming right over the mountains. We live right below this range out mountains, they are very beautiful. It started to sprinkle, but it never down poured. There were some insane looking lighting streaks though--nature's fireworks!!

Once it got dark enough we started driving around looking for fireworks. I drove up this street that is really high up on a hill. We parked and got out and walked up the street to a level sidewalk and looked down in the valley--you can see for miles. Sometimes on really clear days you can see downtown L.A. We waited for about ten minutes and then all of the sudden about eight-nine different locations started setting off fireworks. It was amazing (and free!). Everywhere we looked were fireworks. There were some relatively close to us being set off at the minor league baseball stadium (Quakes) and then there were some so far away that they looked like little tiny balls of multi-colored fire. It was really enjoyable and a great way to end the day.

Stephen said that we needed to go to Nebraska one year for Fourth of July. He said because it was so flat that you could see fireworks for miles and miles and they were all around you. I'd like to see that one day. I can't wait to travel. I want to go everywhere, it's kind of ridiculous.

***

No word from any jobs yet. I've applied for so many. It's kind of hard not to be discouraged, but I have to keep reminding myself that something will come up. It looks like I probably won't start off with a teaching position because in California to teach you need a CTEL certificate. This educates teachers on how to teach students whose native language is not English. Legally, I am not allowed to teach in California without that certificate. When applying for my CA Teaching License I could of shown proof that I have the schooling to be issued a CTEL certificate, but Marshall does not require any courses on the subject (which needs to be changed). Because of this I've been applying to Teacher's Aide jobs in local schools and a few positions with some of the community colleges around town. Hopefully I hear something soon.

I'm learning not to get so discouraged over things. I could of really exploded over the whole CTEL issue, but I didn't. I didn't let myself because it's nothing I can control, I just need to get on the ball and figure out what I need to do. There's a school I'm looking into called University of La Verne--it's about 20 minutes from my house and they offer the program I need. It's only three classes and I can then transfer those credit hours to a Master's program. That sounded like a good option for me! However, the university is private and a tad expensive. School is expensive regardless. I don't want to take out a loan, so I need to be making some money, which brings me back to square one...no job, yet.

Anyway...I'm not going to let my situation bring me down. I'm here in California and I've been wanting to be here for years. I'm loving it, I really am and I'm so glad to be back. Never take anything for granted.

:)
Elle

July 4th, 2011

Hi there, welcome to my blog! I've never had a blog before, so I thought I'd give it a try. I don't belong to any social networks anymore, so this blog will be my only identity online, but I like it. Blogs seem so much cooler than Facebook or Twitter. I could bitch about social networks, but I'll refrain.

I'm not sure what I'll do with this blog--I've thought about setting a theme to it, but perhaps that's too confining. It could act as a journal, but I've got tons of those in hard copy already. I guess why I started this blog is so I could keep in touch with those I care about and have yet another writing outlet. My boyfriend and some of my close friends have blogs, so I thought I'd give it a whirl. Anyways...I'll stop rambling on why I set this damn thing up, haha!

***

So, today is 4th of July. How do you celebrate it? My family has never been huge on the 4th. Yeah, we watch fireworks and make a delicious meal, but that's about it. Is it wrong of me to say that I'm just not that into it? I love my country, I really do, despite the problems we have. I am thankful to live in the USA and have the rights I do, despite the oppression that is still prevalent in our society. Nothing is perfect, and I realize this. I have a brother who's in the army--he's an Airborne solider. The kid jumps out of airplanes, how amazing is that? I support the troops, but I don't believe in war. I love my country and the amazing land within our borders--do you realize how diverse the land of our country is, how many natural wonders lie within our reach? However, I'm not very patriotic. I never have been.

Thinking about it, though, patriotism in this country seems to be quite superficial, which is something I'm not. Again, I love the United States, but I don't feel as if I have to display obnoxious bumper stickers, t-shirts, or USA shit all over my house to show I care. I do care. I care about our country and it's fate. I care about the people who are suffering in this country and the land that's being destroyed. I'm following a career path that I feel is patriotic. I want to be a teacher where I will be supporting the children of this country and helping them learn about the world.

All in all, the 4th of July is a holiday that I celebrate, but quietly. How do you celebrate it?

Much love and peace,

:)